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The Stone Throwers:
A Man-Hunt For Vietnam War Draft Evaders

It was not my fault alone yet I took all the blame

The first and foremost reason why I joined FFF in 2004 was to pour my heart out through creative and expository writing, to express myself as male journalist, as a poetic guy. No picture whatsoever. I stated in there that I am not looking for any relationship because my purpose was just to jot down what's in my heart and on my mind. Then I got your message which was a piece of your advice. I thanked you and we exchanged email addy and YM. Being first time chatter, I didn't know that you could read any notes even if you're offline.

Do you still remember the time you asked me about the short missive I left when you were not online? I told you I forgot what it's all about and you got mad why would I left you a message I didn't mean to. I stuttered. I wanted to deny what I wrote because I have no purpose of playing game or to lie but you were disappointed at me. So I said I mean it. And the rest was history.

I still vividly recall you told me you were ready to stand by me even if I am a single parent and gay or bisexual. You typed “Call me” which I did. My background music was “Unchained Melody.” You liked the song, right? You were listening to the sound until I cut it off.

Did you tell your friends who made the first move of how we got in touch? Do they know it was you who initially messaged me here 14 years ago? Why I keep on apologizing or asking for your comprehension and forgiveness when I was not the first one who initiated our conversation? All I wanted was to share my poems and articles nothing more.

Why should I always take the blame when I was not the first one who made the first move? Grow up and take responsibilities for your action. You got hurt I was in emotional and mental agony too. Stop being so selfish and hypocrite!

And do me a favour, don't unblock me anymore. Geez, you are sick and immature with too much pride!

— Sept. 13, 2018

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